The suspense is effin killin me

Never agree to do an interview "some time after 3 pm".

After A came over this past week he helped me realize that there are parts of my personality that have definitely stemmed purely from being at college, that I had never noticed until he pointed them out. One of them being that I tend to swear a lot more now, and in public. Being surrounded by college students who don't care a fickle about swearing, or so I assume, has led me to become very lax with my vocabulary.
Although on second thought, I should have realized things were going bad when watching a movie in tutorial (a class of 6 people) and my instant reaction to bees coming out of a man's mouth as he bent down to kiss a woman was "oooh shhiii---".
Oops. Pardonnez mon français.

Gosh dangers, when are these people ever going to call.

A Father's Expectations

Jianshe: Fiona's essay was selected as one of the top 6 in her grade.
me: oh wow, that's awesome
Jianshe: Alex got straight A
me: nice
Jianshe: What about you :-) no pressure.

Thanksgiving food coma

KS: I want to be a parent who's strict in practice but cool in methodology.
KT: example?
KS: like, my dad. He's strict in his practice but cool in his methodology.
KT: !??

Countdown

4 Papers (Ethical Reasoning, Anthro, Chick Lit & Japanese Lit)
3 Formals
2 Finals
2 Visitors (N coming from DC and AP coming from home!)
1 Month

I live on a historical landmark

My sink is 90 years old.

And it drips.

Throwback

Pick 20 people you know:

1. Konrin
2. John
3. Smallest Richard
4. Souvik
5. Ke
6. Andrew
7. Anna
8. Big Richard
9. Guoster
10. Terry Plas James
11. Jon Jain
12. Darcie
13. Curtis
14. Reihan
15. Sherry
16. Le
17. Nikkachu
18. Muzzy
19. Brian Campos
20. Francis

What do you honestly think of No. 10?
I think he has the capacity to FINISH people. FINISH HIM TERRY. FINISH HIM.
I think Terry is a very insightful guy and is a great person to talk to. Very in tune with those around him (: <3 Terrbear

Would or did No. 19 and No. 8 go out?
Campos and Richard Li... well, they would make good beer pong buddies. Maybe in the middle of a great match they will pledge their undying love to each other. Jus sayin.

Did you ever like number 3?
Obvs, but I may like his camera possibly more.

If No. 1 died tomorrow, what is one thing that you would need him/her to know?
Konlin, I cannot believe you died not knowing how to do airflares. Oh, and can I have your Joey pouch jacket? Prease?

Would No. 2 and No. 11 make a good couple?
John & Jon already are a couple. Make sure Anna doesn't know. Also their kid would be named Jo(h)n^2.

Describe No. 7 in 3 words:
Romance Novel Addict

Do you think No. 12 is hot?
Dude, she is the hottest and sexiest girl I know. The way she dances, mm, irresistible.

What would you do if you had never met No. 5?
Oh my god. Without Ke Xu in my life I would be 10000x more innocent than I am now.
But really, I wouldn't know that such a caring and devoted friend (and a crazy horny partier) could possibly exist were it not for Kerry Xu.

Would No. 1 and No. 17 make a lovely couple?
Konrin and Nikkachu? Together they can be team Nikkon and take awesome photos. Speaking of photos, Konrin and Linda have the most adorable picture ever. No splitting up that couple, not even for Nikkon :P

What do you think of when you see No. 8?
I think... man, I'm so glad I have an awesome best friend (:
And I also think, maybe you do need a haircut. Actually, I just saw you and I liked the hair. Keep the hair (;

Tell me something humiliating about No. 11
Ooohhh....... when JJain got into Harvard there was a facebook page made for him. The image was of him chugging a bottle of something in between a girl's legs. Good first impression. Good times.

Do you know any of No. 6's family members?
Yeah. They hate me now cuz I didn't recognize them at our show ):
Gonna see them again at Thanksgiving. Gotta get back into good graces :P

What's No. 20's favorite color?
Gray? Black? Dark Blue? Yeah don't deny your emo roots, haha.

On a scale of 1-10 how cute is No. 14?
Oh mang. Reihan is super cute, with a bite. (:
Especially his fake real-smile. 10/10!

What would you do if No. 4 just professed their undying love for you?
It depends, if it comes with a walk through central park, a dinner at a fancy restaurant (bottle of Chardonnay), and a broadway (not that big a fan of ballets). Then I would accept :P

What language does No. 19 speak?
Peruvian. Duh.

Who is No. 16 going out with?
A guy in law school. Or maybe 2 (;

Is No. 9 a boy or a girl?
All man.

Would No. 18 and No. 4 make a good couple?
THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON. Hu, what?

Who do you think No. 15 would be great with from this list?
Sherry and.. Ke. Both so blunt. Plus Sherry and Jenny know each other :P

When was the last time you talked to No. 12?
On Monday night when I had a talk with her that I really needed. Thank you so much.

What is No. 3's favorite band?
Uhoh, I don't know. Clearly I don't like him enough.

Does No. 2 have any siblings?
No. Single child syndrom :P

Would you ever date No. 6?
Well, depends. If it's Andrew CHEN I would say, only if you give me all the money in your top drawer. If it's Andrew PHAM I would say, we did :D

Would you ever date No. 15?
Oh yeah. She was my first girl kiss anyway (:

Is No. 7 single?
No, she ruuvs number 11

What is No. 20's last name?
Denggg son.

What is No. 5's middle name?
Man. Ke Man Xu.

What is No. 10's fantasy?
A CSA party

Where does no. 9 live?
In some rich-ass house in some rich-ass neighborhood. That I'm gonna crash over Thanksgiving :P

Would you make out with No. 13?
I'll show you my case study if you show me yours

Are No. 5 and No. 6 best friends?
Nah, they are each devoted to their own best friends. Or rather, number 5 is devoted to number 4.

Does No. 7 like No. 20?
I'm sure they have some beef over their mutual love - Mr. Bojangles

How did you meet No. 18?
At a session. At first I thought he had the coolest name ever. Oh, I still do.

Is No. 12 older than you?
You know... I don't know... uhoh.

Is No. 17 the sexiest person alive?
I would always choose you, Nikkachu (; (;

Arrested Development

I've started to quote Arrested Development during interesting states of mind.
Quite embarrassing.

Letters to the future

Yesterday evening I was made to write a letter for myself via the Seneca. Ironically it was a very emotionally difficult day for me and I had a lot to write about. Though I don't particularly wish to share all the details here I do want to share a part of that letter.

That part is how important my friends are to me. Though yesterday's shit-show there were so many people that I could turn to for advice or just freak out about to.
There was L, who told me to have strength when I couldn't take another step forward.
T, who told me that talking about it would definitely make me feel better and offered advice of his own.
K, who told me to follow my heart (hah, most succinct advice).
S, who reminded me that I'm not the only one with these problems and that my experiences can help others through theirs.
A, who left a sea salt brownie on my desk after hearing about what happened
C, who brought me a bag of sunchips after she heard it was my comfort food
D, who listened to all my problems and consoled me through them
R, who didn't question my need for a hug but just offered his services
and S walked with me for an hour and a half, all the way into Boston when I could hardly even walk straight.

Of course there are others as well, who have been so great. Writing that, and other parts of the letter, was all part of a cathartic healing process. As I folded, stuffed, and sealed the envelope it was with the knowledge that this feeling, all these feelings were transitory. But where-ever I am when I receive that letter I look forward to remembering or reinforcing the knowledge that there are people around me who care, and people who I need to take care of in turn.

My Professor's Comments on ONE

"Who is George Goy? Go? He is a Super Star!"
"Who was that Japanese guy? He was really good too."
"And who's that guy whose name kept being mentioned? He kept being called on by those other guys."
and
"I liked the spy one. Good job."

Read the first line

I am a bad flirt.

I've always known this, mostly because I don't dedicate much time to thinking about the act of flirting, and also when I think someone is trying to engage in meaningful eye contact with me I usually find it near impossible to look at them back. But also, as I have recently discovered, that I have come to terms with my own limitations after seeing the prowess of those around me.

For a while it would bother me, perhaps I should be more seductive. Surely everyone likes to be attractive, right? But recently I've begun to think of how it feels for the other side. And I think I know how the other side feels because they are probably just like me - drawn into the allure of those who are good at what they do, but most likely never to be one of them.

For, to me, attraction isn't a hard and fast game involving touching, laughing, and sidelong glances.
Instead, it is the irresistible urge to hug someone when you're both up at the net gathering tennis balls.
The strong pull of their shoulder as you're both somewhere up in the mountains gazing silently up at the stars as a party rages just next door.
A knee brushed against my own.
An awkward invitation to a dance after it has been mulled over all day.
Sitting in the trunk of a car, chatting until the sun set.
The comfort of knowing that their front porch will always be open to you, especially when you need it most.
An honest confession.

I guess I've always been a bad flirt because love has always managed to find me in special ways. Though the love may not have always lasted, the process of getting there holds so many precious and tender moments, I certainly have been spoiled, and therefore never really had to learn the art of flirtation.

Kat's Karniyarik: Moving West

Today I felt like moving away from all the Asian foods I've done. After all, I've already tackled Korean, Thai, and Chinese. Japanese I just eat too much of anyway.

But there's really nothing American that I particularly want to eat and nothing French that I can make. Then it hit me, what is east meets west? Is it fusion food like mac and cheese sushi? NO, it's Turkish!

After today though, I must say that Turkish isn't really eats meets west, but more of a style of its own. Mmnn, stuffed eggplant.

Misery poetry

Weekend retreats were a blast
Too bad weekends never last
Now there's so much work to do
that I'm stressed through and through
mostly because I now have the flu.

Poo.

Chez Kat part deux

I realized that I never ended up uploading the food photos.

I cannot make pancake-esque food for the life of me. Might as well just give up on it. The green curry, on the other hand, turned out well. I was going to make my own green curry paste but some of the ingredients (galangal, kaffir lime) were impossible for me to find so I gave up on that right quick.

The theme, I guess, was green. Down to the margaritas that went along with this meal. Yum.

SENECA

I got in. Yey (:

ONE

was a success.

Sleep time.

One week to ONE

The last week and a half was an utterly draining one for personal reasons. And by personal I mean I haven't had the time to look back and discern exactly what it was that was stressing me out and making me an emotional wreck, but I'll have to find some pause soon to do so.

And no, that one entry (you know which one I'm talking about) was not me going off the loose end, but if you read my tags you'll see that it was my friend taking on my persona in a most flattering manner.

In any case, I'm looking forward to the next few weeks.

First week of Nov. will be the WorldMUN and Breakers retreat. 2 retreats in one weekend - exciting. But before that...

Our first ever breakers show is coming up and I am not incredibly nervous (I'm sure everything will come together) but very excited. Now, I just have to continue practicing (without injuring myself, I can see all the bruises developing).

The title ONE is interesting. In the past we have never had pieces that we would only perform once. A routine learned was a routine performed every (other) weekend. But this time, with all 10 pr so pieces lined up, this is the one and only time we will put on ONE. Now I'm getting nervous.

Today I don't feel like doing anything

Except making Thai Green Curry and Scallion Pancakes. I swear this is going to work, guys. I'm going for a Chinese meet Thai dip your Scallion Pancakes in Green Curry kind of thing.

Originally I was going to attempt Indian food, but why spend money buying the ingredients when I could just hop over to Kebab Factory and get a scrumptious buffet lunch for 8 bucks? Yeah, thought so.

Anyway, pics to go up next entry. I love having my Tuesdays off.

A Super Cool Day

Hey Guys!

Life has been so busy lately. I spend a lot of time writing essays and doing MUN stuff. In between, I like to take cold showers because I think it keeps me healthy. I have been writing a lot of essays though. Currently, I am working on my essay for ethical reasoning. I don’t have many ethics to reason with, so it’s kind of challenging, but you know me, I LOVE the challenge!!!!!! I think Professor Puett will be really happy with my essay! He’s a lot cooler than John. He’s a fat hoe, dawg!

Today, I woke up at 9 AM. I was kinda tired and still pretty drunk from last night which was HELLA CRAZY! I went to go eat brunch with some of my MUN friends at this super cool condo. It was way awesome, you guys should’ve seen it! I think MUN is really cool and I am really happy that I am doing it even though I have to write lots of handbooks and stuff for them. My MUN friends and I have started our own UN. I’m China, obviously, and we ALWAYS settle things diplomatically. HIGH FIVES ALL AROUND YO!

After I ate, I went to Konlin’s rehearsal. He’s so cool *fangirl squeal* Today he had us drill parts of his choreo. I think we are making a lot of progress! Someday I hope to be as good in dancing as Konlin!

KAKOI!

Well, I have a lot of work to do now! Bye guys, until next time!

Peace, Love, and Cankersores

Kathleen YunYun Tang

Strange

Walking through the yard this morning a man in front of me turned around (somewhat) and commented to the air above him "I like how your red matches your black. It's very haigh fashion" in a Bostonian accent.

"Thanks", I responded. We walked in tandem for another few seconds until he paused to let me pass and made a right.

Designspiration

I hate it when I find inspiration online but can't even begin to fathom how to replicate it. Sigh.

The other images were too big. This one's boss.

Heart for Deviantart.

Let me enumerate the ways this morning was not fun

1) Woke up at 7:30 to do work, ended up studying for midterm & sleeping at the same time
2) Dining hall had no more muffins by 10:07

3) My boots have holes at the bottom

4) It's raining (which would have been ok if it weren't for the above (3))

5) Did not go trainingsu

Since I don't have class on Tuesdays, Wednesdays are like Mondays all over again.

Before I hit the hay

Packed day tomorrow, ick. Hope I get out of it in one piece - I really don't look forward to tutorial. Global pop sounds awesome but the class is (un)structured such that I feel as though it is a 2 hour time-suck. Gross.

Today I had to make a haiku about myself. While I failed, my friend K came up with some:

they call me kat tang

i am like water untamed

harvard needs cute girls

kat tang is my name

an alcohol addition

is my game, homeslice

& finally

cash rules everything around

me, CREAM get da money, dolla

dolla billz y'all - kat tang

The people reading this application will probably think I'm a gangsta... which is exactly what I want them to think. Also, the last haiku doesn't even follow haiku convention. That's how subversive and awesome it is.

Side note - I (aka JM) installed CS5 and am no longer a newb :D ding!

Rolly Polly

Did too many somersaults at 8 am. Now suffering from what feels like the morning residuals of a (non-existant) pretty crazy Sunday night.

Food

I love reading about food, so I might as well write about it. How has food factored into my life lately, let me count the ways.

1. Recent discovery of love for vegetables. What happened to being a carnivorian?? But when your dhall's food sucks and there are vegetarian options out there (as in outside of the dhall) like grilled eggplants smothered in cheese and green curry, who needs meat?

2. Kind of related to the above post - so when one has a strong dislike for one's dhall food, what is one to do? Well! Try new things of course. And what better way to spice up a meal then to literally add tabasco sauce to it. Especially when it's Chipotle flavored. Except try not to mix up the Chipotle with the Habanero... and then realize your mistake only to then toss on a lot more Chipotle. I think I set my mouth on fire.

3. Cooking! This has been my only thing I've made, really. But it's a promising start. Seafood pancake & Korean tofu soup. Both delicious goodies. Next time I'll go for making Japanese food. Some Katsu curry, miso soup, and something else Japanese and delicious. Omnomnom.

4. Drink tasting (; Mnn Frangelico. This stuff is it. Hazlenut flavor for the win.

5. Finding new places to eat. I love exploring and discovering good food. Did you know there was a place by Burdicks called Hi-Rise Baking Company with scrumptious sandwiches? Well you do now. Yelp and I are bffs for life.

It went on and on and..

I was asleep in a bed in Shanghai circa a mixture between the 1920s and 2001. Awoken by my alarm on my crappy Nokia cellphone that I used in South Africa, I rolled out of bed and went about my daily morning duties before A, my fellow intern in Cape Town, a group of friends, and a teacher figure who was a mix between Madame and Professor Theidon (some intimidating female figure) walk in.

No sooner than the people had walked in did the alarm start going off again. This set off a mad scramble to find the phone - no where! Where was that annoying alarm coming from? Eventually I found the phone, but its data had been erased and all that was left were photographs of revelry. None of which I recognized or was in. Frustrated I chased after the group of people who had already left, eager to get away from the loud and obnoxiously ringing alarm.

Going through the revolving doors and into the misty weather I eventually caught up with the group at a corner shop. The alarm was still ringing. A showed up in a qipao telling me that Madame/Theidon really cared about my family and had bought us all sorts of small goods. I complained "The world is an alarm! It's warning me!"

And then I woke up and realized my alarm had been ringing for the past 10 minutes. Whew, seemed like a day in dream-time. Inception complete.

Commitments

I think I'm too amused reading other people's blogs to post on my own.

Anyway, here is the backdrop to my year - my commitments!

School Work: 2 core classes (learning the philosophy of my ancestors and reading romance novels), Junior Tutorial (our TF wants to do a module on porn where we'll watch everything from soft core, to hard core, to interracial and then analyze it using a freudian lens - titillating, he called it), and Japanese Art and Gender (by far my most reading and analysis intensive class) for my VES secondary.
Overall not bad so long as I keep up with readings and try not to zone out too much during class. Lighter workload leads to more procrastination.

Breakers: Our first show of ever is coming up this October! Once we start pubbing it it'll be official. Looking forward to the practices & bonding. My gcal is over flowing with breakers blue.
Overall going to be super intensive come October when we try to really pull this show off - looks already like I'm having practices almost every night...

WorldMUN: Study guide edits equals 40 x 8 more pages of reading for me, sigh. I can't even skim this stuff! But, truly, the people in WorldMUN are what make me stay, and the people are awesome! Every time I hang out with them it's all laughs. I cannot wait for Singapore.
Overall it's a constant barrage of work that never quite ends until committee sessions come to a close (post conference trip bliss!) but so, so worth it.

Crimson: Where's my money for doing design?????? I meet a new person there every time. It's interesting.
Overall I'm sad that there are no more board happy hours. Clearly I got back into it at the wrong time. Also, sport design is challenging but fun. I don't like skipping my dinners every time I design ):

Consulting: Aka summer internship in general. It's kind of hazily always in the back of my mind.
Overall stresses me out about how low my GPA is and how I need to raise it to get good summer internships. Oh, and I need to finish (aka get past page thirty of) Case in Point. Bah.

Mario Kart: R, I will beat you... sommme daaayyy.
Overall some things never change - what can I say.

On the road to consultingdom

Aka I just ordered Case in Point off the internet.

Today's task: go to a Bain info session.
Result: Listened to a recent graduate talk about the important aspects of consultingdom (don't be a tool during interviews, only bother staying at info sessions if there will be people you know there, Bain>BGC & McKinsey, hah). Attempted to follow her and the crowd as they walked to the info session. Decided to take alternate route. Got lost. Ate fish tacos at Border Cafe. Sessioned.

The end.

Polaroids part deux

Food always looks better in polaroid form

Qui est?

Oh hello Korea!

Sexual Tension

No Comment.

On the first day of class

I realized that I bought two bottles of shampoo instead of a bottle of shampoo and a bottle of conditioner. Bollox.

collection & recollections

I hope that some day I will have this feeling where when I do something for myself, it is no longer just for the betterment of me, but for me and someone else. Though, I have an inkling I won't achieve this for a while. (Is it an achievement? Maybe I should just say that it won't happen for a while.)

Visited my friend L in San Francisco at her law school dorm. Her room is probably 3 times the size of the one my roommate and I share at Harvard. Sigh.

It seems sacrilegious to comment after a polaroid but... polaroid app ftw.

Though it doesn't beat the real thing.

The next day I was up early and we wandered about town eating, praying (aka taking deep breaths after feeling nauseated from too much food), and talking about love.

Eat

Pray

Love

At home today -- I felt like drawing. (This is what happens after life changing events to me, I suppose) So I drew for the first time in ages. When I was little (aka in high school) I created "original characters" which are like imaginary friends on paper. This one's Kattachu. Say hi!

I tend to draw the expression that I have.

Or do I test the expression I'm drawing out on my face?

Anyway, to round out this random collection of drawings & photos. I arrived back to California and mother took me to a Japanese noodle place. Omnomnom. I still can't believe you don't have to wait for an hour and a half for food to arrive at your table. In any case, took this awesome photo in a noodle bowl. I think that it sums up my sentiments, good times and bad in multiple ways. I didn't think of this at the time of taking the photo. When I took it I only thought of sending it to someone near and dear to me. I never did send it and now I'm posting it here as one last gesture of memory, for the inside jokes, the arguments, the anticipation, the excitement et al. I present to you:

fin

Mefloquine induced dreams

My anti-malarial medication states that I will experience dizziness (check), headache (check), insomnia (sometimes check), and vivid dreams (check). Here I'll just delve into my experiences with the last of the lovely quadruplet.

An average night in Tofo looked a little something like this:

Fall asleep exhausted at 10 pm.
Dream one: I'm walking around a labyrinth like structure looking for my classrooms when I run into my APUSH teacher, Phipps. He takes me into a class with windowed walls where Tsuna in "reborn" form (from hitman reborn.. if you don't get it, don't worry), a gundam, and a fat girl in cosplay are doing bicycle crunches on a hardwood floor.
Dream two: Michael Jackson is young and dapper and deathly skinny, dancing around and showing me how to moon walk while the light bounces off his glittering pants and suit.
I wake up at some random hour, battling with my mosquito netting and see that it is still dark outside. Readjust, fall asleep again.
Dream three: I was the hero. There were people after me. As I was holding a meeting atop a sky scraper someone detonated a bomb that caused the entire building to collapse (conveniently in slow motion). I rebounded off nearby buildings to save myself and saved an old man in the process. Once on the ground I transformed into a female version of myself (was I male before?) and someone else transformed into the male version of me to try to trick those who wanted me dead.
Dream four: My high school friend R had filled the bottom of a warehouse with treats and goodies for his crush, D's birthday. There were crackers with jam, lots of savory goodies, and all in costco style, stacked up and in units of 1000. D came in and was not impressed. Meanwhile, starving African people walked through while grocery shopping. We tried telling the cashiers not to let these people take what R had stockpiled but by then it was too late. R looked around the empty room and lamented that he had spent 60,000 USD on the whole affair! At this point D started to feel a bit guilty and so we turned on music and started a cypher. D did a few awkward ccs and another friend from HS, T, egged me on to participate. I top rocked a bit and woke up at
6 am. Just in time to see the sun rise

Tofo

Mozambique is...

Really early mornings

Acrobatic yoga

& Lots of seafood

3 am on the Mozambican border

There are free drinks on Air Namibia and I requested Kosher food (a good tip for anyone planning on flying Air Namibia -- go for the Kosher food -- they bring it to you to personally open and the food is 50x better than the regular stuff. Or try the Hindu one and let me know how it is.

To put it gently, by the time A and I arrived at the Intercape bus station at 10 pm in Johannesburg we were in no condition to deal with the shitshow that was about to hit us.

Though all our friends had been allowed to receive their visas at the Mozambican border for some reason the bus conductor this time was adamant about not letting us on without our visas. We yelled, we cried, we were generally drunk. Somehow I ended up being good cop and paid the people for a ride to the border while A cussed them all out in Spanish (which the entire bus understood because they all spoke Portuguese). Once on the bus the driver returned my money to me saying "look, I want to work with you on this one ok. If you run to the border and get your visa before the bus goes through we'll take you through". Appeased, I fell asleep.

At 3 am we awoke to run through to the border. After waiting for a measly 10 minutes I was issued my visa and ready to head back to the bus to continue my nap. Too bad it's never so easy.

In a border - where their only job is to stamp passports and print visas at 3 am they had run out of toner. They couldn't print A's visa. There were no replacements -- the next replacement for toner would come around 2 pm that day. We were going to be stranded on the border of South Africa and Mozambique at 3 am.

To make a long story short -- after much protest the border finally wrote A a handwritten visa and promised to send a real copy to the bus station in the capital for us to pick up later that afternoon. However, before we arrived we received news that they had lost her photo and fingerprint information and had to take another bus back to the border and then take the local transit (jampacked with people carrying bags of flour, chickens, who knows whatelse) to the capital city ourselves.

Just writing this entry has tired me out. whew.

Why did the Springbok cross the road?

... to give us a good reason to get compensation from the car hire company.

But to begin from the beginning. After nearly missing our flight to Namibia, A and I were finally situated safely in our seats looking out over the Namibian landscape.

To give you an idea, it looked a little something like this literally less than a minute before we touched down.

After renting a car and driving on a nice, normal, paved road for 30 minutes we hit dirt road. After 2 years of not touching a steering wheel, driving along a cliff on a road full of loose gravel was not my ideal way to get back into the swing of things, but I suppose we can't all choose our roads. Particularly not in Namibia (where you have like only 5 choices).

When mother came to Cape Town I paid nearly 200 USD to go on a safari where the animals were essentially like animals on a farm demarcated to particular watering holes that you could 'observe' in their natural habitat. Driving down the C28 in Namibia I saw all those animals and more crossing my path.

When there were no animals in sight the world was a desolate place full of sand, rocks, and a tree or two.

Finally, as A took the wheel, there were only 15 km between us and Swakopmund: a real city, with people, buildings, and a paved road. But things were not to go so smoothly for us, the first day in Namibia.

Perhaps due to fatigue, perhaps due to her nearsightedness, we came up to a T intersection racing down a gravel road at 120 km/hr, nearly twice the speed limit on gravel.

Soon the sign "<- Walvis Bay/Swakopmund ->" was right in front of our faces and a collision seemed unavoidable. "TURN!!" I remember yelling and the steering wheel was jerked to the right. From there all I remember was the skidding sensation, we were slipping, slipping and there was nothing either of us could do to stop it. Did I have my eyes open or shut? I can't remember, but the next moment our car was tilting, and we were rolling. Everything was happening slowly yet completely, and in an instant we were upside down as I watched the windshield crunch, creating the weblike pattern it does so well.

A breath. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah"

"I think we should get out"

"Yeah"

Carefully, I undid my seatbelt and landed on the roof of the car, disorienting. Slowly pushed the door open and stumbled out into the sand and rock, surveying the damage.

My camera lens didn't open all the way for a while after the tumble - but of course I didn't realize this at the time.

Luckily Namibians are a nice bunch of people and helped us out with turning our car right side up and letting us sit in their car while we waited (for nearly an hour an a half) for the 'emergency fleet' of the car hire company to send someone over to tow our car. Doubly as luckily, our accident happened to close to Swakopmund and not somewhere in the 6 hour ride between Swakopmund and Windhoek where we passed perhaps one car every 2 hours. Yet infinitely as luckily (I know, I'm pushing it), neither A nor I were hurt in the accident except for a rather persistent cut on my pinky toe.

At the time of the accident somewhere in between being right side up and landing up side down all I remember thinking to myself was "aw shit, now we won't have a car to get around in."

It wasn't until a day or two after that I thought to myself "I'm truly lucky to be alive".

And so, ladies and gentlemen, set against such a background, the battle across Africa began. Though there were many hardships still to be endured, after the car accident they were all things I could look back on and laugh at or at least shake my head at with a wry grin. With the car accident though I laughed at the time (the body copes in wondrous ways), now I can only cringe and think to myself "lucky, damn lucky".

Battling in Africa: The Preface

Vacationing in Africa is somewhat like a long sustained battle. A battle where any respite feels like a victory. Wandering out of the lovely cocoon that is Cape Town, South Africa I realized that 'Africa' is anything but Cape Town.

These past two weeks have worn me out for sure, but in return I saw worlds untouched by anything but a single dirt path. Since there's a lot of ground to cover (like the 6 hour drive from the capital of Namibia to the next town with something more than one family and goats, Swakopmund) I'll try my best to divide up the next few posts and keep them focused.

Pito pito...

As A, my dear spanish flatmate commented during dinner today, it was a day when 'all the masks fall away'. As far as I'm concerned, this may be the most open post about (a few of the) people I've met here.

I want to preface it by mentioning that I've had an amazing time with the people I've met and that the memories I share with them are surely irreplaceable, regardless of what I discovered today. To quote A again, "a day like this, you have to be grateful for, it is very rare to discover these things about people".

It started after I finished my last day of work. (I didn't expect today to be my last day, but they hosted a tea party in my and AB's honor, so it was as good a day as any to be my last)

I picked up my laundry with AB, who had been my partner in crime (photographing projects, getting lunches, exploring antique shops long after our lunchbreaks were over) for the past two months at Sonke, and we walked back to our flat not quite believing that our time at Sonke was over. Upon arrival at her place I decided that I needed to finish cutting my bangs as my previous method of erring on the side of caution resulted in bangs that were still a bit too long. Thus I ended up at her place slowly and cautiously continuing the further self-butchering of my hair.

As I sat in front of her mirror her roommates D & L were discussing their plans for the next to week and also for the evening. D asked AB about her 'date' tonight. Date tonight, I thought to myself and then inquired aloud, what date tonight? Oh yeah, AB shrug laughed it off after a split second awkward pause, I forgot to tell you, I have a date with AJ tonight.

What? I tried to shake this off with a laugh of my own - have fun. I left her house soon after that.

At first it was hard for me to pinpoint what I was feeling - jealousy wasn't the word, as AJ and I were just friends, but we were good friends. And AB was my good friend as well - why then hadn't I heard about this earlier? I couldn't help the disappointment that I felt. I had known AJ for the past two months and I had only introduced AB and AJ once a few weeks ago when the three of us hung out.

From there nothing of particular interest happened until I heard from AJ three or so days ago that he was to watch a movie with AB and asked if I wanted to come. I heard nothing from AB herself. I thought to myself then that perhaps AB knew that I wasn't particularly into hunky vampires and sultry werewolves and therefore she didn't think it necessary to invite me or that it was ok that she only let me know about an hour or two before the start of the movie that she was going to decline my offer to go out that night and instead go watch a movie with my friend, all without extending an invitation. Though I felt jilted, I brushed it off by thinking that she must have had some reason for being as cold as she was. Je ne give a damn pas.

But this time it felt different, was she really not going to tell me at all that she was going on a 'date' with him until forced to admit it by D? What was the secrecy for - if it's something to be ashamed of then don't do it, or at least inform your friend ahead of time if it's something that feels wrong and needs to be covered up. I might quote A a million times in this entry but she does sum up things quite nicely, what she did was "just not nice".

This turn of events left a bad taste in my mouth, as I felt that someone who I had been so close to for the past few months had deliberately kept a secret from me, for whatever reason.

Yet it was still my last day of work and this was a cause for celebration! A and I decided to go out for dinner and invited our other Spanish friend, D, to come along. D told me "sorry but I feel like cooking today -- maybe you can come by tomorrow to my place and I'll make some nice spanish stew or whatever and then we can go out for drinks after" and told A "I am really tired today, besides, I wanted to go out yesterday and you guys didn't go so now it's my turn to say no".

Regardless, A and I decided we would enjoy our night, so after the gym we tried to decide where we would grab dinner. "Pito pito colorito..." (the spanish equivalent of eenie meenie minie moe) decided that we would go to the upscale Jardin right next door.

We spent some time downstairs further debating our decision but eventually felt bad for the waitress and had her lead us up the stairs to our seats. Much to our surprise who do we see but D and his South African 'colleague' sitting at a table for two for a nice, no doubt, date.

D's lines from previous encounters came to mind:

"I am too tired to go out today"

"I feel like cooking today"

"She is just my colleague, we are just friends" (we had met the two together on other occasions each time with him insisting they were work colleagues and us giving him the benefit of the doubt)

"I haven't had a date worthy of Jardin in a long time, that has to be someone you've been dating for like, years"

"You know, that is why I am single"

"I can't go to Jardin, it reminds me too much of my ex-girlfriend"

And perhaps worst of all, "White guys in South Africa are too ashamed to have a colored girlfriend because once you have one all the white girls won't pay attention to you anymore. But colored girls are much easier so a lot of guys have one on the side but won't admit that they are officially dating." Who knew he was referring to himself. Shame.

As our jaws dropped a little lower, Ana spewed out in Spanish what she either had the decency or just the lack of ability to not say in English, "caught red-handed, you cheater".

He had the gal to invite us to sit down at his table with him, and when we refused this offer a waiter brought us a nice bottle of wine bought for us by "the gentleman at the next table". Hohum, we took this offering without much ado as a sign of his guilt; it was by no means a accepted as a peace offering.

The dinner itself was delightful as the waiters remembered us from our world cup days where we would sit downstairs and watch the game while eating their crema catalan. For an appetizer we were brought a complimentary dish which we were promised "tasted like eating a cloud" and how! Delicious. Oysters, duck confit, sirloin, line fish, bread baked just for us, foie gras and more crema catalan. I haven't eaten so much and so well in ages.

As D and his colleague left we embraced and as we said our goodbyes he commented to A in Spanish "thanks for the wine..." insinuating that he was hurt by our lack of gratitude. There was no response from A and the couple departed from their disastrous dinner.

As for A and me, we had a nice laugh, finished our wine, and chatted with the waiter who requested to meet up with us some time during our future travels. If there is yet another crema catalan involved, or perhaps the cauliflower mousse aka cloud in a bowl I'm down.

All in all, the day has certainly been an interesting if not exhausting one and there are nuances and details in the relationships that I have forged here which I am too tired or unable to do justice to with this blog post. Forgive the rant-like style, it's not meant to be a rant but rather an account of the day with some of my thoughts thrown in for creating a blended palate. I don't really feel angry, rather I am in a state somewhere between surprise, amusement and a tinge of disappointment.

Truly, these two months I have learned so much about people. Relationships and people are never simple and I think this is definitely a subject I keep revisiting and revising my ideas on. However, these two months I have learned in leaps and bounds and have come out of it a bit more inspired, a bit more cynical, but still (and I can't seem to find the right word here but maybe) fresh.

With these developments, my time in Cape Town is soon drawing to a close as I'm being kicked out of my flat on the 31st of July. From there I will be traveling to Namibia, Zambia, Zimbabwe, and Mozambique - wherever the planes, buses, cars, camels, hot air balloons, rafts, and kayaks take me.

Peace, Love & Cankersores

In line for cold soup

As a student of photography and anthropology, objectifying people with my photography is something I'm constantly worried about.

However, when I see an adorable kid sometimes I just can't help myself. All I see is their adorable-ness - I pull out my camera and try to unobtrusively take a quick snapshot, fudging the quality in the process (sorry Killip & Harper!).

It is only afterward, when I am looking at the photograph on my computer screen that I notice how poor their conditions are and wonder why their parents weren't with them.

How did I happen upon the best people ever?

Halfway across the world when I'm feeling fat, unattractive, lazy, apathetic, or what have you,

I get the best messages from my friends "U r the best ever! hahaha! (;" and "I love you too... remember you the most beautiful girl in the world".

Despite all the english mistakes and the messaging-after-I-just-said-goodnight...

How did I make such wonderful friends? I don't know, but (:

Mama Africa

A week of hanging out with my mom in Africa and I am utterly exhausted. Being a tourist is much more tiring than working at an office.

Since there has been a dearth of photos lately in my posts I'll make this one a photo entry.

Saturday: Mother arrives and my bed gets a little bit smaller

Sunday: We walk around a lot and enjoy the nice weather. An introduction to a relaxing lifestyle

Monday: The back-breaking adventure begins with a safari (and ends with eating the animals that we saw: springbok, ostrich, wildebeest oh yum!)

Tuesday: Penguin day! Nuff said.

Wednesday: The mountain climbing excursion that almost was. It turned into a stroll/hike along the top of Table Mountain.

Thursday: Kirstenbosch Gardens (mother loves her plants) and then the World of Birds (and monkeys). This one deserves two photos because the two places are as different as morning and.. afternoon.

Friday:

Mom "I've never been drunked before"

D, Spanish friend who drove us around the wine lands that day, "there is a first time for everything"

Dutiful daughter "and it might as well be in South Africa"

Saturday: From the Biscuit Mill to passing out soup and bread to the squatter camps near the airport to dinner at the Water Front - a final tour of the many dichotomies of South Africa.

et fin

The hour before lunchbreak

Africa is messy. In a strange way – it functions on the surface but beneath there are all types of problems that force people to adapt on a day to day basis that they are surprisingly good at. The internet cables under the ocean have eroded because while they were working no one cared about their maintenance. I can't quite determine if this attitude arises because there are always more pressing issues at hand, or if it is because there is a day by day attitude to life. When speaking with a taxi driver about the World Cup in Brazil he responded “yes if we are alive in 4 years”. Alive in 40 years, possibly questionable, but alive in 4 was always a given. Although 5 minutes after we nearly were hit by another car, to which the taxi driver gave me another quote “we are the heroes eh, we don't die easily”. I felt very uneasy that night.
People say to live each day as if it were your last, but perhaps if that were the case people would live a life of decadence and possibly ruin. Not exactly sure where I'm going with this train of thought – just that if I were to live my life 'to the fullest' knowing I won't be around 4 years down the line I would lead a very different life.

On a more light hearted note – mother is coming this Saturday - the only planning I've done thus far is that A, a young Cape Townian man living his dream studying as an actor, is saving me 400 rand by helping me pick up my mom from the airport.

Just got a text from the shop saying my laptop is ready for pick up. Oh gravy, wish me luck.

If I haven't been speaking to you lately it's not because I don't love you. I love you very very much.

Bought mini speakers to keep me entertained while my laptop is kaput (dropped it off my bed -- . Was going to do a photo entry blog, but that will have to wait until DigiCape: The most reliable apple provider outside of apple itself (one hopes) gets back to me about the status of my poor 6 month old baby.

In other news, this weekend was the end of the World Cup. A was ecstatic as her country won the World Cup for the first time. The night involved some froyo, some singing, some salsa, some bottles, some sushi, some fabulous men, and a whole lot of dancing. Sounds kind of like any other night in Cape Town, actually.

Going on a bit of a tangent here - but went to a restaurant called Beef Cakes not realizing that it was targeting the same clientele as the gay bar right next door. On our way out we met a guy who has defined 'the best pick up lines' for me forever.

"Ohhhh! Gay or Straight? Do you have a big penis? Wait (here he grabs for himself) yeesss. Do you know how to use it?" all while the poor man is shocked stock still. Brilliant.

Feel it! It is gone: This week after all the festivities have ended, Long street, the hub of match watching and club hopping this past month, was completely desolate, with half of its restaurants closed for the night. The lack of vuvuzelas blowing was oddly depressing despite the word 'vuvuzela' never having been used for the entire last month in a positive way or without a swear word attached. It's interesting how we love to hate things.

After my month long yoga stint it is now back to the gym for me. Hopefully I can take a belly dancing class as well... but who am I kidding. The real reason why I want to join is because they offer free tea, a gorgeous lounge, and a jacuzzi. But the real real reason is because I've become addicted to desserts. I eat like 2 sweets a day. Glubglubglbu.

The anti-shit list

Too many random things happening to write a cohesive entry, but I might as well try to write them down - perhaps in increasing order of awesomeness:

- Finally ate so much that I've reached a place where I actually never feel like eating again (yet I still eat, HMM). Notice how this isn't really awesome at all, but kind of sad and thus is at the beginning of this list - things can only get better once you hit rock bottom.
- Enjoyed 2 sunny weekends (mind you this is a Cape Town winter) filled with beaches and good company.
- Went wine tasting for the first time and quite possibly enjoyed the cheese & bread more than the wine itself. Although I do like a good chardonnay.
- Went to Jardin after hearing they have the best creme brulee in cape town only to be told that they discontinued making it about a year ago. Had an expresso souffle instead which was decent. The owner, perhaps wanting to celebrate Spain's victory with us, served us a Crema Catalania for free - what a treat indeed! The brownies with nuts were scrumptious and the dark chocolate cup holding the crema with cookie crumbles as little surprises within were delightful for the taste buds. And the light mousse on the sides with almonds placed delicately on top. Oh my. Also met someone from BC who is going to treat us to a dinner should Spain win against Germany. Come on Espana, my Crema Catalania round 2 is on the line!
- Went sea kayaking & saw whales up close (unfortunately not at the same time)
- Got a free ticket to a World Cup Round of 16 match.
- Received financial aid from Harvard & will be extending my stay in Africa for 2 weeks: Zimbabwe? Mozambique? Don't mind if I do!

5 flags become 2

I purchased 5 flags (well, purchased 4, was given one) for the world cup: Spain, Brazil, South Africa, USA, and Italy.
Today the number of usable flags became 2.

Also, as an awesome anthropologist blending in with the locals, I was the only one in the entire pub supporting the USA. Having everyone cheer when you feel a crushing sense of defeat is saddening indeed.

But it's nice that there's a collective pride in Africa due to Ghana's win.

In other news -- up until this past year I had never gotten a pedicure frightened to death of those stories of unsanitary beauty salons my mom relayed to me from some TV show back in the 90s. Thoughts of deformed feet and fungus infestation kept me far away and at bay. Today I went to a Chinese salon in Cape Town. The itchiness in my heel better be from the new stockings.

Espana, Espana, nana

Again I forgot my camera. Aye, never learn. Luckily there will be another Italy match on Thursday and another Espana match on Friday. I've got my flag ready for Spain, still need to buy one for Italy.

Today it was off to the water front to watch the Spanish match with a bunch of Spanish people! Exciting, seeing as how this time Spain actually won! In my excitement I managed to devour a dinner's worth of corn nuts, chips, beef jerky (or deer jerky, whatever it is they have in South Africa), and dried fruit. Og, I need to go on a serious weight loss plan.

Moonlighted as a Spaniard, as I was asked "Where are you from?" on the streets several times, and each time I would answer "Espanaaa!" and then run away before I was forced to respond with any of my well practiced spanish phrases (necessito comer - I need to eat, estoy hambrienta - I'm starving, te amo - I love you).

Ended up at a bar where we met up with the Italians from the previous day. D, a very tall and humorous spanish guy, took my good friend A out to see his boat. This launched the Italians into a heated conversation. Apparently in Italy, the sexual come-on is "would you like to come see my butterfly collection?" (those Italians sure know how to get women). According to Steven Pinker it's "would you like to see my etchings?" (no witty comment about Harvard professors getting women comes to mind). According to the Germans I met at WorldMUN it was "would you like to see my stamp collection?". I informed them that the Americans were far less subtle and our "booty calls" are somewhere along the lines of "shall I get a condom?".

Other interesting encounters for the night included: a Japanese lady who kept telling me how pretty I was and showed me off to her friends. She also told me to beware of Italian men, like G, who was standing there smiling sheepishly; that and a whole host of Irish guys dressed up in communist outfits (they were supporting North Korea in the match today - a shocking 7-0 score, yikes!).

All in all a successful evening. I'm bringing my camera with me everywhere from now on. Fsho.

Italia, Italia, Italia... la la

Watching football with two Italians with "mojo" resulted in possibly the cutest thing I've seen in ages.

Two guys, both with impecable hair, ray ban sunglasses, and outfits that put my frumpness to shame, sit with me at a table in Claremont where we have just eaten almost everything on the sushi menu for half price. Each guy has one chopstick at times in his mouth at times between his teeth as he stares agonizingly at the TV screen showing the New Zealand vs. Italy match. At Italy's free kick, G, the more easily handsome one to my left, holds onto his chopstick with both hands and hides his face behind it, lowering his head down to the table peeking through where he can. D walks stands up and sits down, then stands up, then sits down again. He also employs the typical "what the fuck" Italian hand motion: touch your thumb to your middle finger and then wave your hand toward and away from your chest. For more emphases use two hands. For even more, take the hands up to move behind and in front of your head.
By the end of the match there is a pile of wooden shavings heaped neatly on our table.

I wish I had brought my camera.

On being fat and dumb

I thought that China had prepared me for fakes by ohhohhoh how I was taken hook line and sinker for this one. Herbal Infusions.

And here I thought I was lucky for the free trial sized extras

Now I check all backs before buying anything.

Also, KFC in South Africa. That's a zinger chicken and a hash brown. Omnomnom. I hate winter cuz I gain weight. Now I'm going through two winters. Fudge. (mmn, that sounds good right now)

Box Master ftw